Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer – what went wrong?

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As Hollywood’s most unexpected couple, Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer kept everyone guessing with their on-again, off-again relationship. The Grammy award winning, multi-platinum selling musician was a surprise pick for Jennifer Aniston, the golden-haired sweetheart otherwise known as the ex-Mrs Brad Pitt.

But it seemed to work for them and they appeared to be in love. Their high-profile appearance at this year’s Oscars was seen as an official sign that they were a serious, committed couple. So, what went wrong?
Bad boy appeal
Bad boy appeal is one of the things that may have attracted Jen to John Mayer. Voted US magazine’s “Cad of the year,” John is frequently labelled as a playboy and womaniser. And this is perfectly understandable: he’s young, has lots of money and gets to meet plenty of absolutely gorgeous women (Jessica Simpson, Cameron Diaz). Why shouldn’t he have fun now, before he thinks about settling down and having a family?

And it’s no wonder Jen was attracted to this typical bad boy. Jen never knew what to expect with John, things were never boring. John knows how to have a good time and often took Jen to some of the hottest clubs in LA and New York. Life with John was exciting, fun and unpredictable.

I’m sure that Jen enjoyed the excitement, thrills, and sense of danger that a bad boy like John brought to their relationship. She’s always been a play-by-the-rules kind of girl (she even made a movie called The Good Girl) so she’s probably intrigued with men who scoff at rules and shrug off responsibility.
Recovering from bad boy addiction
Unfortunately, relationships with bad boys usually end in tears. That’s because bad boys won’t change unless they want to—no matter how long-suffering their partner might be. After the initial honeymoon period, most women get tired of wondering if their man will make it home from a party or if they’ll catch him with another woman. So often, a relationship with a bad boy can end up being far more trouble than it’s worth.

So how can you break a bad boy addiction? One of the first things you can do is listen to your gut instinct – and to your friends. Yes, you do deserve better than a guy who takes you for granted. You do deserve better than a man who is always late, stands you up, can’t offer a valid explanation of where he was last night, and has way too many women in his life who are “just friends”. You do deserve better.

If Jennifer Aniston wants to recover from her fatal attraction to bad boys like John Mayer, she should definitely re-think her position on the appeal of good boys. If she wants a relationship that will last, she needs to consider going on a date with a nice guy. Someone who will look after her and treat her well. Once she changes her definition of what's interesting and attractive, she will find the stability and predictability of a nice guy becomes magnetic.
Fear of intimacy
Interestingly, relationship experts say that one of the reasons a girl finds a bad boy appealing is that she can be with him without ever letting him get too close. Bad boys very rarely commit to a monogamous, long-term relationship. Perhaps Jennifer is attracted to guys she cannot really have, because they don't want a real relationship, and she has a secret fear of intimacy.

This fear is understandable after going through a high-profile and heart-breaking divorce. It probably took a long time for her heart to heal and for her to begin to trust men again. And every time she falls in love and then gets her heart broken, it affects her self-confidence. It wouldn’t surprise me if she is very cautious about who she lets into her heart.

It is difficult to begin dating again after you have had your heart broken. Jen needs to be honest with the people that she dates and should tell them that she is still a bit wounded and won’t give her heart easily. She should also take her time when she begins dating and make sure that she dates nice guys who are only interested in committing to a serious relationship. Slowly, she will rebuild her confidence and begin to open up again.

If you feel that, like Jennifer Aniston, you’re constantly meeting the wrong people, Two's Company can make it easy for you to meet appropriate single people. People who are at the same stage of life as you with complimenting lifestyles and personalities, people you see yourself having something in common with. Visit us at www.twoscompany.net.nz to find out more.