Mayor Pitt - What a Laugh!

Brad Pitt Doesn’t Want To Be New Orleans Mayor, Even Though He Does
http://www.hecklerspray.com/brad-pitt-doesnt-want-to-be-new-orleans-mayor-even-though-he-does/200938505.php

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Brad Pitt, Brad Pitt New Orleans, Brad Pitt mayorBrad Pitt’s talents are limitless – making Jennifer Aniston cry, not being quite good enough at acting to win an Oscar.

Actually, that’s about it. OR IS IT? Because Brad Pitt might be about to run for mayor of New Orleans. And by ‘about to’ we mean ‘has definitely denied wanting to’, but let’s not get a stupid fact mess things up, shall we? Brad Pitt is totally going to be the mayor of New Orleans!

Obviously it’s a front Brad Pitt to snatch the city’s children and raise them as his own, but that doesn’t matter. Brad Pitt! Squee!

You may be aware of the completely imaginary competition between Brad Pitt, Jennifer Aniston and Angelina Jolie to see who can promote their new movie in the most preposterous way. Up until now it’s actually been a lot of fun to witness – Jennifer Aniston usually gets all “I hate Angelina Jolie“ and Angelina Jolie retaliates by getting all “Hey Jennifer, look at these babies I’m breastfeeding! Guess where they came from? That’s right – BRAD PITT’S BALLS!” – but now Brad Pitt has waded in and spoilt everything.

Because to promote Inglourious Basterds, Brad Pitt has decided to heavily imply that he might soon run for mayor of New Orleans. Now that’s not as mental as it seems – not only does Brad Pitt have a home there but he’s also committed to rebuilding swathes of the hurricane-ravaged city – but, still, how are Angelina and Jennifer going to top that? Unless Angelina Jolie gets crowned as queen of Namibia or Jennifer Aniston goes out and punches a unicorn unconscious, Brad’s got this all sewn up.

Not that Brad Pitt is actually running for mayor of New Orleans, of course – he’d much rather be vague and enigmatic about it all, as Today’s Ann Curry found out this week. The Chicago Tribune reports:

When asked if he has considered a run, Pitt replied semiseriously, “Yeah, I’m running on the gay marriage, no religion, legalization and taxation of marijuana platform.” Curry pressed Pitt, asking him if he was serious. “I don’t have a chance,” Pitt said repeatedly, seeming to evade the question. Curry asked again, and Pitt finally said, “No, that’s not what I do best.”

Thank God. A figure like Brad Pitt can achieve so much more if he remains independent of the political community. He can change the world in so many ways – via his charitable work, his campaigning for gay rights, his uncomfortably violent revenge fantasy movies about smashing up Nazis with baseball bats – that it’d be a shame if he became a mayor or a governor or the president of America or anything stupid like that.

So if Brad Pitt isn’t serious about becoming mayor of New Orleans, the competition is back on. Great – Jennifer Aniston’s got a film out next month, and we hear she’s planning to run for Archbishop of Canterbury. She’d look good with a beard.